Tuesday, June 30, 2009

6 Reasons Why I Don't Drive

too many assholes on the street

It has been scientifically proven that for every 10 drivers in the Philippines, 8 are retarded.
The other 2 are either a reincarnation of Attila the Hun or a descendant of Jack the Ripper.
And simply put, I don't wanna be a part of it.

i don't trust my instincts
I can't tell whether I'm going fast or slow enough. I wouldn't know when to shift up. I don't react fast enough. I brake too late, or too early. I can never do a decent reverse park. I just don't trust myself controlling a machine I cannot carry. You know that saying "the car is the extension of the driver's body"? I don't feel it. I'm me. The car is the car.

drinking and driving
I'm a drinker. And I would have hated to be forced to stop drinking because I'm going to drive.
That's what taxis and "friends" are for.

i can daydream
Don't you wish you could just stare outside the window during long drives in the country? Enjoy the beautiful views? The scenic Bob Ross mountains, the majestic cloud formations above, the enigmatic ravines below? Don't you wish you could just smile foolishly while everything zooms past you? Never having to think. Never having to care. Just you and the forever moving world?

That's right, you can't. Because you're too busy driving.

too much video games
Gran Turismo, Need for Speed, Driver, Wipeout.
Those are the only driving I've ever done that i enjoyed. With my oversimplistic mentality on the concept of driving, I'm afraid I might subconsciously apply it in the real world.

I like being utos-free.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Johnny Depp and Tim Burton in Wonderland

The eccentric director teams up once again with the eccentric actor.

For the 7th time, storyteller Tim Burton takes out his favorite puppet, Johnny Depp, from his chest of toys. This time, for a re-imagining of Lewis Caroll's Alice In Wonderland.

I know what you're thinking... Another movie with Johnny Depp in an over the top makeup made by a director with a track record of overdoing his visuals. Right? Same old thing right? Boring right?


Its Alice in F*cking Wonderland!

If there's one story most fitting for this two freakishly odd artists, it's gotta be this.
An LSD hallucination inspired tale of a girl trapped in a dream. With characters so off beat and sequences so far out that is almost not suitable for children. A queen who orders heads chopped off at whim, the demonic cheshire cat, and of course, the crazy hatter, which is going to be played by...
Just look at that picture and tell me you're not excited. You can't. It's impossible not to get excited.

Word is, except for a few character photos, Burton's visual style for this film is under a very tight secrecy cloak. He said he can't tell exactly what the look is going to be like because there's absolutely nothing like it ever done before.

The story will not be a remake of the previous movie. Nor an interpretation of the 2 books. It will take place a few years after the 2nd book ("Through a looking glass"). Which means Alice is now a (hot) teenager. Although the main plot is not yet revealed, it will revolve around Alice going back to the wonderland and meet again with the weird creatures she saw the last time.

Tim Burton has created some of the most memorable worlds in cinema's history. Edward Scissorhands, Chocolate Factory, Big Fish, Sleepy Hollow, Planet of the Apes, Beetlejuice, and Batman. And Johnny Depp has become some of the most extraordinary icons ever. Edward, Willy Wonka, Sweeney Todd and Jack Sparrow,

Each one of those world was amazing.
And Each one of those characters were addicting.

I can't wait to get inside this Wonderland.

Monday, June 22, 2009


I must admit, the trailer looks awesome.
The details are amazing.
I've never seen CG effects this realistic on any movie ever before.
Kahit sa youtube mo lang panoorin, mapapanganga ka sa ganda ng visuals.

But then again...

Jusko naman! Roland Emmerich? Are you kidding me?
Remember 10,000 BC?
The trailer also got me excited.
But alas! The movie was trash.

Still, panonoorin ko pa rin 'tong 2012.
Kahit alam kong pangit ang storya.
Keso ang dialouge.
Dumbed down ang characters.
At predictable ang magiging ending.
Anyway, I can always switch off my intellect and just gawk at the mind blowing CG effects.

Go Roland! (The poor man's Michael Bay!)